Teenie Thoughts

It usually means a few things:

• My feet hurt because I am back to wearing real shoes instead of flip flops or bare feet all day.
• I have to retrain my bladder to use the restroom at 10:30 recess, 11:45 lunch and 2:15 recess.
• I actually DO have to get up and get ready when the alarm clock goes off.
• I have kids that have stuff every day. School stuff. Stuff that I get to go to after being at school all day. I love my kids and their stuff. But summer is nice without all the stuff.
• My house is quiet by 9.
• I am struggling to finish laundry, dishes, make lunches, AT 9.
• I need a real calendar and planner.
• There is real work.
• I get 22 new fresh faces to which I get to train to line up, learn, sit down, learn, count, read, put things away…..awww….yeah. That.
• I have to decide if I really like my clothes because bathing suits and capris rock. Tights are uncomfortable and real pants pinch.
• I am starving. ALL day. Mostly because I can’t eat when I want to.
• Bye Bye naps.
• Being hit full force at single parenting during the week.
• Crap. Homework. Crap.
• Candles. Aww…it is not too hot for candles.
• Snuggly soup days with a crockpot.
• Crap. Rain.
• Christmas is like…soon.
• TWO kids birthdays.
• TWO kids birthday parties and gifts.
• Rushing.
• Driving every day.
• Realizing today…that I have five kids in five differnt schools and only ONE of them is elementary.

I think the list gets longer every September….

Yeah. My house smells like this….the peppermint bark candle. It is a cross between Godiva and Christmas.

Yum

I have returned….
*bow*

I realize it has only taken WEEKS to get back on board. BUT here I am.

The past few weeks have been REALLY long. Getting kiddos ready for school was not exactly a picnic. It is so hard to shop for four kids in a mall where everyone wants something different and the only person that cares about the price tags are Mom and Dad. Needless to say, I was not a happy camper when we left. Finding jeans to fit an 11 year old boy that were “cool” was not exactly simple considering he is the skinniest kid on the planet. ON THE PLANET. So, he ended up with two pairs he likes and two he can survive with.

Finding jeans for an 8 year old who weighs more than the 11 year old also proved to be somewhat troublesome. I swear she is between sizes and everything was either pinching her or falling off. Both of those are hot looks. She also likes any ugly shirt that you can find. Beads, swirls, sequins, and cats or any animal that looks finger painted. Heaven help her fashion sense.

Amy and Andie were eh…this year. Amy just wanted the most expensive jeans imaginable and was willing to give up her clothing budget for everything in order to just get the pants. Whatever. She has shirts. Andie on the other hand needed an additional “special” trip to finish because she is a snob and the mall we were at didn’t cater to her needs. Did I tell you that this is where I about lost my temper in the middle of the Nordstrom’s Rack?

School supplies-check.
New lunch box for Beezy-check.
I got two new pairs of jeans. I figured I will wait until fall to buy some new heels. I am so picky on shoes for my fat little feet that I like some that fit well. Oh, and are on sale.

Meetings for me for the return to the real world. Oye Vay. I don’t mind so much going back or the getting up early. It is the getting up early and being presentable that is a problem. I am tired and want to go in my pajamas I tell ya. Anyway, the meetings went well and I was pretty excited about a few things–like the new math standards and the lessons.

I am also excited for this year. Last year bought the farm. YES. BOUGHT the farm. I was miserable with life in general and functioning within some disfunction. I really wanted to say functioning within the crap, but that sounded icky.

This week has also proven to me that I may need to move. The kids on my block have been driving me bonkers. Ok, so bonkers is putting it mildly. Amy’s car got “rocked” by a “Dare”. It wasn’t even a freaking Double Dog Dare and my car looks KEYED. The punks. So I get to deal with that. I am trying to figure out how to handle the police report. It is a pain. NOT thrilled about it. But dammit, we have had the car for less than two weeks.

Otherwise…that is where I am right now. I am sure I have other stuff but the mush of my brain is not working with me at the moment.

I am pretty dern happy just to be able to type without an error message and know it might actually post! WOOP WOOP

I am not sure WHAT is up with the site. I have emailed support to no avail is anything getting fixed.

I might need to put up a stink shortly….

So, please, stick with me. I am hoping it is fixed soon.

In this sitcom of my life. Ok, it is more like Knots Landing or Dallas, or one of those good 80’s dramas; but whatever it is….when I get signed for my television show for my effed up life I am hoping that SOMEONE finds humor or something in it because HELLO I am tired of living it. I could count the ways but right now, I am just plowing through the last 24 hours of EFFED UP!

Seriously.

Amy–newly employed. THANK GOD. Since we have said she couldn’t drive until she could pay for insurance (which was a JOKE and another post that I will show how angry and irritated I can be–much like how I was today with the people at Comcast). She was about to get a license this weekend —and after strenuous thought processes of insurance and automobiles we had almost come to a conclusion and when/how/what/etc she was going to get her license now that she was gainfully employeed.

Well that went down the toilet today.

SHE BROKE HER FOOT. Jumping on a trampoline. JUMPING ON A TRAMPOLINE. She plays softball. Golf. Slides into home plate. Kicks her siblings. Runs. Jogs. Trips. Whatever. AND she broke her foot JUMPING on a trampoline. She didn’t fall off. She didn’t trip. SHE JUMPED and moved her foot forward. She jumped. And broke her foot. BROKE HER FOOT IN TWO PLACES in the metatarsels.

Seriously. SHE BROKE HER FOOT. The foot she DRIVES with. SHE WORKS IN A SHOE STORE.

I spent the day doing this:

1. Dr. Appointment for her to get her mandatory drug test. (that lady was full of personality let me tell you–but I guess looking at pee all day zaps the life out of you)

2. Dr. Appointment for her to get her teeth looked at since it has been ONE week since she had her teeth pulled out. (Oh and that was a great time too)

3. DR APPOINTMENT (see a pattern?) for her to get her FOOT looked at—oh yeah, THE BROKEN FOOT looked at.

Tomorrow–oh yeah. An APPOINTMENT for Amy to go to the orthopedic surgeon.

Seriously. I might throw a clot. There is a small, eensy weensy, possibility that there is a crushed part of her bone in her foot.

OH. MY. GOD.

Otherwise, a possible 5 day venture with crutches. THEN four weeks to heal. Oh wait–still need to see the OS.

Oh. My. GOD!

So when this show is live on the air, I think I want Jennifer Garner to be me. She is taller and has better dimples than I do (oh wait, I have ONE and it doesn’t show up much in my too fat cheeks). I am sure somewhere this is like the Jim Carrey show that wasn’t a show it was life but it was a TV Show…remember that? And people are at home right now laughing at how I am FREAKING out over this. I am also trying to consume as much wine as possible so that I can wallow in my problems and prepare you all for next week’s episode.

So stay tuned.

Location: Kenny Chesney concert—Seattle Washington

Jase: Look at the girl in tge cut offs , bikini tops and cowboy boots

Me: Guess she is trying to make a fashion statement

Jase: Wow, there are a lot of them.

Me: Yikes, guess the statement is a trend.

Jase: Apparently

Go ahead and say it.

Pathetic.

I only wished I had my camera and not just my phone…the lovin lasts only a short time before dogs must eat flip flops and sniff crotches. Which is exactly what happened 2 minutes after I took this photo.

Beezy: Dad, what does it mean to divorce someone?

Jase: Umm…well. It’s when husband and wives don’t live together anymore.

Beezy: Oh, and then you like have to lose your ring right?

Jase: Sort of. It is more complicated than that.

Beezy: Oh. So you lose the ring? Right?

Jase: Well, you can keep the ring if you want to.

ME: Beezy–it’s when a mom and dad decide they need to live in separate houses and that the kids then have a house with mom and one with dad.

Beezy: But do you keep your ring?

*is hiding head in shame*

I think I have not only fallen off the Spin Cycle wagon, I have been drug behind it, ran over it, toppled over it, and tried to aimlessly grab a wheel as it rode past me.

Yeah. Well. I am back.

*at least this week I am*

So, looking back at my blog entries….I have many that crack me up. This one is about my kids and sheesh are they nimrods. They make me laugh whenever I watch this video.

Or this one because my husband and I NEVER agree on clothes. Ever.

Or maybe this one, because I Heart Will Farrell and Dave Grohl.

And apparently, I was really funny in 2008 and not so much funny since then.

Guess I am losing my touch.

But if you want more Spin Cycle, check out Sprite’s Keeper. She’s got it and is still funny.